Have you heard someone's lifestory and felt that they have been given a raw deal, whilst for some other people, their life story feels like things were thrown in their kitty and all they had to do was to use the opportunities thrown their way.
I saw the youtube video of this girl called Aisha Chaudhary ( http://inktalks.com/discover/54/singing-in-the-life-boat ), who passed away recently at the age of 18, battling a life-threatening medical condition, leaving behind a life of inspiration for many. In contrast, I see so many other 18 year olds who are working hard and getting the the fun life you would expect for someone their age. An example could be the popular celebrity child Jaden Smith here.
Having been through a long recovery myself, I have often wondered the same for myself when I saw my best friend live a normal life without any of those nagging issues. People might call it luck. But, I think that's too easy an excuse for the world of a difference in the lives of two people. Hence, I have myself explored the Question of fairness of life.
Aisha said something which I feel makes a lot of sense. People who go through tough times, experience life more intensely and fully. It gives them a deeper understanding of certain things, which will reflect in some work of theirs in some profound way. In case of Aisha, it is through her very mature words ( Please watch the video link.). There was a time, when I would feel that I lack something or do something wrong because of which I am going through such traumatic times. But, the more I recover and grow as a person, I realize that it's neither a lack in someone nor is it a glory given only to the courageous someone, that causes difficult times. It is a reflection of the challenge we need for our next level of growth. This challenge might make us look unlucky or small in the worldly view for sometime or for a lifetime. But, that view hardly matters for our inner growth.
A person who recovers from a difficult injury gets a resilience which a person who's never been that hurt does not even know. Knowing that you have resilience is a great power to have. It gives you the courage to undertake bigger challenges and hence experience a greater life. This also does not mean that one who's in trouble is especially blessed either. It's just the phase that they are in, which will change. Does it mean that everyone should get hurt. Well, I think everyone does get hurt at sometime. We just need to retain a certain innocence, a certain light headed-ness through the pain and let it flow out just the way it flowed in. We need to let go without holding on, once the experience is over. The experience should only teach us that such things also happen and help gain insights on dealing with that well.
Growth happens when there is hard work and rest. By law of nature, bad times need good times to be effective. One just needs to do the action and keep at it with faith. Actions revealing good results is the law of nature. It cannot be altered because that's the meaning of action to begin with.
It doesn't matter what the challenge is. What matters is that we believe that we can surmount it and that we see ourselves get to our next level in our mind first and then eventually in reality. To do this, one has to look at themselves deeply and not compare with someone who is in a different growth place altogether. If we can do that and focus on overcoming our challenge, we will soon be in the good times of our growth cycle and feel the totalness of the challenge. If we can do this with an open mind, even the so called bad times will feel like the enriching experience they are. If we keep it simple in the head, we can experience the profound inside. This is what Meditation also gives us. Simple in the head = no comparison + humility about our abilities and lack of it.
It's not wrong to compare, it's incorrect to do so.
A person who's been in a grave accident will obviously appear more fearful than someone who has not been in one, if you compare them in the first year of the accident. However, once the latter overcomes the fear, that person will have an inner strength which will be far stronger than the former. Hence, comparison would be incorrect at that time as well. Using comparison to hail life as unfair is equally incorrect.
When I think about it, I don't want to be my best friend. I do not even want
to be Priyanka Chopra for that matter, who's reaching the pinnacle of
success as per media. I want to be the Neha, that I know I am capable
of being, from deep within. I have something very unique to offer to the
world and I want to do just that and gain acceptance for that. That I can only do, by being more
than what I am now, by overcoming my current challenge (my
injury recovery). Would I reach my
goal faster if not for this challenge? Yes, maybe, but I think I would
need the superpower I will gain after overcoming my current challenge to reach my goal anyways. So, I should collect it on
my way to my goal, even if it feels like a detour. Does my best friend
already have the superpower because of which she's not going through
this? Yes, maybe she does or maybe she does not need it now. We need to
trust our journey and not wonder why other people are not on it. What we
lack, other people may have in plenty. At the same time, what we have
in plenty would also be missing in others.
In my particular case, what I have lacked is open-ness in my heart to what I'm not good at. Having been an achiever since childhood (topper through school and college), I always thought that I should always be on top no matter what. I entered dance, hoping to win salsa competitions when a hamstring injury while doing super quick splits brought me down on the floor. That injury went up till my back and kept me out of dance for 5 long years. I got busy with studies and other things so as to not miss dance. When I did get back to it, from being the best in my troupe, I was nowhere in the troupe because I could hardly touch my hands to my feet no matter how hard I pushed. That's when my journey began to discover what my injury had affected and the hard work it takes when you start at ground zero. There is no ego boost in what you do because every single day, everyone in class is way better than you. It takes pure passion to go out there and push your hardest and still be behind your worst nightmarish imagination of your strength and flexibility. That was also the beginning of my spiritual journey of, firstly doing stuff for the passion of it, not the ego boost out of it. Secondly, finding happiness even if at the end of the queue because you destroy the queue in your head. You realize that you are on a unique growth path and hence no one can compete with what you do with what you have at this current moment. At the same time, I learnt to get inspired from what people do with what they have. While I was learning to stand straight, my best friend was reaching in dance what I originally intended for myself 8 years back. Interestingly, she became my guide and inspiration, once I stopped victimizing myself for what happened to me. I learned simplicity from her, which gives her an open-ness to critique and success. She does not go into depth of understanding of things unlike me, but she makes up for it by her acceptance of whatever she is at this moment. I really love her. Today, I have body alignment knowledge which I know will help me great deal when I turn a teacher myself. I have magical massage fingers which I learnt as I massaged myself to ease out stiff muscles. My spiritual journey is where it is because of the desire to get better than ever in every aspect when I turn a teacher.
If we take any two people in the world, they will have different abilities. What we really need to do is harness what we have. A lot of differently abled people break more records than a fully abled person. That is purely because they work on what they have been blessed with and eventually make a mark in their category. The first step is to accept what we have and be open to what we need to work on. Life is always being fair.
I intend to be a pre-natal and post-natal fitness teacher and a social entrepreneur eventually. I believe that an empowered and happy mother is the foundation to fit and happy kids, because she is the first support system that the kids sees from the womb. Fit and happy future generation will mean a more progressive world.
We need to use the strong base of 'faith in'/'love and appreciation for' what we currently are, as a launchpad to strive/learn for our next level. The more you don't see yourself as a victim, the more you won't be so. Slowly, you'll see that your journey is fair and is giving you exactly what you desire and what are ready to receive.
All's fair in life and it all.
We tend to think that fame is the best thing to have. Some regular people enjoy greater peace of mind than any celebrity and hence lead much healthier and deeply happier lives. Hence, what a person has in life is based on what they want and nothing can be quoted better or superior than the other.
Life works for you, if you work with it. You enter into a relationship with it and control what you can. The changes in life without a heads-up and it's control over our losses give us the apparition of it's unfairness. Those changes come for a purpose and we need to do our bit for it.
I remember the scene in GOT, when Daenerys decides to take her marriage into her hands and tells Khal that she wants to face him. The day she decides to work with her husband and not as his victim, she becomes his princess for real. -S01E02 .
We need to do the same with our lives, face it with all we've got.
A person cannot describe love in words, it is an experience. After some words of theory on it, it has to be experienced. Fairness of life is similar. Words can only describe it so much. Description can be used as an initiator to get one started on the journey. Rest has to be assimilated by an individual by going for the ride and feeling it for themselves. I really hope that this article gets you started on the fairness sojourn in life.
You get treated fairly always is what I can guarantee or vouch for. I think that's awesome. A Guarantee that we are as important for the universe as people we think are more important, is awesome. We are as important as a Sundar Pichai, who runs Google!
It kills all my complaints and makes me feel like the universe is mine and that I'm valued and loved alike. I am All Smiles. I hope you feel the same by the end of this article :)
I saw the youtube video of this girl called Aisha Chaudhary ( http://inktalks.com/discover/54/singing-in-the-life-boat ), who passed away recently at the age of 18, battling a life-threatening medical condition, leaving behind a life of inspiration for many. In contrast, I see so many other 18 year olds who are working hard and getting the the fun life you would expect for someone their age. An example could be the popular celebrity child Jaden Smith here.
Having been through a long recovery myself, I have often wondered the same for myself when I saw my best friend live a normal life without any of those nagging issues. People might call it luck. But, I think that's too easy an excuse for the world of a difference in the lives of two people. Hence, I have myself explored the Question of fairness of life.
Aisha said something which I feel makes a lot of sense. People who go through tough times, experience life more intensely and fully. It gives them a deeper understanding of certain things, which will reflect in some work of theirs in some profound way. In case of Aisha, it is through her very mature words ( Please watch the video link.). There was a time, when I would feel that I lack something or do something wrong because of which I am going through such traumatic times. But, the more I recover and grow as a person, I realize that it's neither a lack in someone nor is it a glory given only to the courageous someone, that causes difficult times. It is a reflection of the challenge we need for our next level of growth. This challenge might make us look unlucky or small in the worldly view for sometime or for a lifetime. But, that view hardly matters for our inner growth.
 |
| Aisha with her loving dogs. Taken from Google search. |
A person who recovers from a difficult injury gets a resilience which a person who's never been that hurt does not even know. Knowing that you have resilience is a great power to have. It gives you the courage to undertake bigger challenges and hence experience a greater life. This also does not mean that one who's in trouble is especially blessed either. It's just the phase that they are in, which will change. Does it mean that everyone should get hurt. Well, I think everyone does get hurt at sometime. We just need to retain a certain innocence, a certain light headed-ness through the pain and let it flow out just the way it flowed in. We need to let go without holding on, once the experience is over. The experience should only teach us that such things also happen and help gain insights on dealing with that well.
Growth happens when there is hard work and rest. By law of nature, bad times need good times to be effective. One just needs to do the action and keep at it with faith. Actions revealing good results is the law of nature. It cannot be altered because that's the meaning of action to begin with.
It doesn't matter what the challenge is. What matters is that we believe that we can surmount it and that we see ourselves get to our next level in our mind first and then eventually in reality. To do this, one has to look at themselves deeply and not compare with someone who is in a different growth place altogether. If we can do that and focus on overcoming our challenge, we will soon be in the good times of our growth cycle and feel the totalness of the challenge. If we can do this with an open mind, even the so called bad times will feel like the enriching experience they are. If we keep it simple in the head, we can experience the profound inside. This is what Meditation also gives us. Simple in the head = no comparison + humility about our abilities and lack of it.
It's not wrong to compare, it's incorrect to do so.
A person who's been in a grave accident will obviously appear more fearful than someone who has not been in one, if you compare them in the first year of the accident. However, once the latter overcomes the fear, that person will have an inner strength which will be far stronger than the former. Hence, comparison would be incorrect at that time as well. Using comparison to hail life as unfair is equally incorrect.
 |
| I do not want to be PC, even if she's really famous. Apparently, I resemble her. |
 |
| Open-ness of heart makes one humble, simple and accepting, all at once. Strength of heart helps keep one going and open to life even after a hurting experience. It removes the notion of specific-ness of routes to happiness and opens us up to the fairness and love of the universe. It makes one believe in oneself and experience life from there, work hard from there. Believing in our own strength is believing in the universe. That's when we get in tune. |
If we take any two people in the world, they will have different abilities. What we really need to do is harness what we have. A lot of differently abled people break more records than a fully abled person. That is purely because they work on what they have been blessed with and eventually make a mark in their category. The first step is to accept what we have and be open to what we need to work on. Life is always being fair.I intend to be a pre-natal and post-natal fitness teacher and a social entrepreneur eventually. I believe that an empowered and happy mother is the foundation to fit and happy kids, because she is the first support system that the kids sees from the womb. Fit and happy future generation will mean a more progressive world.
We need to use the strong base of 'faith in'/'love and appreciation for' what we currently are, as a launchpad to strive/learn for our next level. The more you don't see yourself as a victim, the more you won't be so. Slowly, you'll see that your journey is fair and is giving you exactly what you desire and what are ready to receive.
All's fair in life and it all.
We tend to think that fame is the best thing to have. Some regular people enjoy greater peace of mind than any celebrity and hence lead much healthier and deeply happier lives. Hence, what a person has in life is based on what they want and nothing can be quoted better or superior than the other.
Life works for you, if you work with it. You enter into a relationship with it and control what you can. The changes in life without a heads-up and it's control over our losses give us the apparition of it's unfairness. Those changes come for a purpose and we need to do our bit for it.
 |
| Daenerys and Khal |
I remember the scene in GOT, when Daenerys decides to take her marriage into her hands and tells Khal that she wants to face him. The day she decides to work with her husband and not as his victim, she becomes his princess for real. -S01E02 .
We need to do the same with our lives, face it with all we've got.
A person cannot describe love in words, it is an experience. After some words of theory on it, it has to be experienced. Fairness of life is similar. Words can only describe it so much. Description can be used as an initiator to get one started on the journey. Rest has to be assimilated by an individual by going for the ride and feeling it for themselves. I really hope that this article gets you started on the fairness sojourn in life.
You get treated fairly always is what I can guarantee or vouch for. I think that's awesome. A Guarantee that we are as important for the universe as people we think are more important, is awesome. We are as important as a Sundar Pichai, who runs Google!
It kills all my complaints and makes me feel like the universe is mine and that I'm valued and loved alike. I am All Smiles. I hope you feel the same by the end of this article :)
